Beast Untamed: Beasts of Bodmin Moor, Book 3 Page 14
God. That made her sound like a complete and utter sap. How could she word this so that Nathan didn’t think ill of her? “We were engaged to be married,” she said firmly. “Justin was a successful property investor. That’s how we met. I worked for an event planner and really enjoyed my job. When I met Justin, he asked me to join his company. We worked well together, and I loved being able to plan openings and presentations for him. We were happy at first, but after we became engaged, things changed. He didn’t want me to work anymore. Just wanted me at home.”
She grabbed her wine again and took a fortifying swig.
“He’d just bought a new apartment in central London, overlooking Hyde Park. It needed renovating, so he put me in charge of organizing builders, plumbers and the like. It wasn’t long before he started complaining that I was getting everything wrong, and he set about overseeing things himself. When I began looking for another job, he kicked off. Said no wife of his was going to work. That’s when he got Willa.
“I loved her from the moment he brought her home, but it wasn’t long before he didn’t like that either. He said I fussed over her too much, paid her too much attention. He didn’t like that she messed up his place.”
She glanced down at her dog again, realizing that she couldn’t tell Nathan any more. There was no point. It wouldn’t change anything, and it wasn’t as if she intended staying around long enough for this thing she had with Nathan to go anywhere. “By then, I’d had enough,” she said flatly. “So… I ended things.”
Nathan grunted, bringing her gaze back to his.
“Way beyond fucking time,” he snarled, nostrils flaring. “What’s with the bastard?”
From the vehemence on Nathan’s face, Erin knew she was right to end her explanation at the point she had. She knew of men like Nathan. Hardnosed in so many ways, but they didn’t take kindly to men who victimized women. She’d seen how protective he was around Naomi and Talia.
“I blame myself to a degree,” Erin said truthfully. “I should have walked out long before things got so bad, but I always hoped our relationship would improve. When he wanted to be, Justin could be sweet and kind.”
“Sounds like he was a freaking asshole.”
She gave a nervous laugh, both because of the intensity behind Nathan’s comment and with the relief that came from telling him. Not that she’d voiced the full extent of Justin’s conduct. Until that last day, she hadn’t even wanted to admit it to herself.
“You think I’m weak,” she said, watching his reaction closely. “Staying with him like I did.”
He pursed his lips and began stroking his thumb lightly across her palm. The effect was soothing and wildly erotic. Strange how she could want him so much, while at the same time feeling an emotional wreck. But his strength seemed to wrap itself around her, seeping into her pores. His sheer power was a comforting balm, but also a potent aphrodisiac.
“There’s nothing weak about sticking around trying to make things right,” he said gruffly. “It takes courage to stay. Easiest thing in the world is to walk out.”
His eyes took on a steely glint that gave Erin the impression that he wasn’t only referring to her situation. “You sound like you speak from experience.”
He shrugged. “Most everyone knows of someone who takes the easy way out.”
Erin could feel the tension in the hand he still had wrapped around hers, could see it in the hard line of his jaw. For a moment, the look in his eyes intensified, but then it was gone.
Not breaking eye contact, Nathan raised her hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. Shockwaves of need shuddered through her body, making her forget Justin and pulling her entire focus on the man before her.
“Want to see the rest of the house?”
She smiled. “I’d really like that.”
He stood and came around the counter, his hand not leaving hers. He coaxed her to stand, and when she was in front of him, he slipped his arms around her. “I’m glad you found your way here, Erin.”
She stole her arms around his neck. “Me too.”
His mouth touched hers, light and easy, but his hold was anything but. Again, in Nathan’s arms, Erin felt safe and protected. It was a dangerous way to feel. It made her want things that she didn’t think she could ever have. It made her want to stay. To build. To put down roots. And she couldn’t do those things. At any moment, Justin could find her. He could hurt her. Hurt Willa. Hurt anyone she cared about.
She pulled away from Nathan’s hold. “The light’s fading. Do you think you should show me those plants first?”
She tried to say it flippantly, but her voice shook a little. Since Nathan didn’t release her, she placed her hands on his chest. Beneath her palms, his heart beat steadily, strongly.
He was a man who could take care of himself, she reasoned. She really didn’t have to worry about Justin hurting Nathan. Physically, Nathan could make mincemeat of her ex, but Justin had other ways of hurting people. She didn’t really know how deeply he was mixed up in the shady underworld, but she had met enough dubious types at Justin’s gatherings to know there was some involvement.
She would never again put anyone she cared about in jeopardy that way. Which meant she should really be starting to make her plans to leave Bodmin.
Why did her heart hurt so badly at the mere thought of that?
“When you’re ready,” Nathan said softly, “I hope you’ll tell me the rest of it.”
Erin swallowed. “I—”
His kiss silenced the protest she was about to make. This time, it was Nathan who pulled away. “Let’s go find those plants.”
Chapter Ten
Searching for plants with Nathan proved a fascinating experience. While he didn’t know a common weed from a rare specimen, he listened attentively while Erin explained what she knew about the plants and shrubs they spotted on their walk across the moor. He also asked intelligent and probing questions, which made her think he really was interested.
Now, relaxing on Nathan’s sofa in the living room, having indulged in a yummy pasta bake, Erin enjoyed the contentment that washed over her. Nathan’s arm around her shoulder kept her anchored to him. “What did you bring for dessert?”
Erin had popped the apple pie and cream in Nathan’s refrigerator before they’d left for their walk on the moor, and had told him not to peek.
She tilted her head and looked up at him. “I thought we said we’d wait another half hour before we ate dessert.”
“Yeah, well. I’ve got a packed schedule planned for the rest of the evening.”
“Really?” Since neither of them had alluded to the fact that Erin would stay the night, she glanced at the clock on his entertainment center.
“It’s too dark for you to drive back now,” he said, following the direction of her gaze. “You might get lost on the moor, and then I’d have to leave the warmth and comfort of my big bed to come to your rescue.”
“You’re inviting me to stay the night?” For form, she fluttered her eyelashes. “Do you have a spare room?”
“I have several. Not that you’ll be using any one of them.”
“Well, in that case… Dessert is apple pie”—she ran her hand along his thigh—“or me.”
He stroked his fingers along her cheek. “How about I have you and then the pie.”
“Your cake and eat it too, so to speak.”
He stood and pulled her into his arms. “When you put it like that…”
His lips were firm as they angled over hers, but there was a softness about his kiss, a tenderness in the way he held her. Erin sank into his embrace. It felt different somehow. Tender, but no less demanding. Easier, but no less possessive.
She gasped when he hoisted her into his arms and wrapped her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck.
Willa, who was half-asleep by the fire, let out a pitiful
whine.
Erin glanced down. “It’s all right, baby. I’m fine. Everything’s fine.” She was already sliding out of Nathan’s hold. “I’d better settle her down in the kitchen. If that’s okay with you.”
Nathan let her down but kept his arms around her. “Of course it’s okay.” He narrowed his eyes. “If you’re worried about her messing up the kitchen, don’t.”
“Not everyone likes to have dogs around the—”
“If I didn’t want her around, I wouldn’t have asked you to stay the night.” He dropped a light kiss to her mouth. “I’ve already worked out that you two come as a pair.”
He released her but took her hand in his and led her out to the kitchen, with Willa following closely behind. “I’ve got some old towels around somewhere,” he said. “Why don’t you choose a spot for her while I go and find them?”
He kissed her again before bounding up the stairs. Erin watched him go, marveling at how easy he seemed to be over her relationship with Willa. Not once had he made her feel awkward about her concerns for her dog, and here he was making sure Willa’s needs were taken care of before anything else. She didn’t fail to notice he was more than ready to start on that packed schedule he’d planned for the evening. She’d felt his erection prodding against her own throbbing core while she’d been hoisted around his waist. And she’d seen the gleam in his eyes…
She thought back to the first time they’d made love. When she could have sworn his eyes had turned to gold. Since then, she’d convinced herself that it had been a figment of her imagination, but when he’d held her a few minutes ago, she was sure there were golden glints around his irises.
She gave a mental shrug and went into the kitchen. Who knew what happened to her own eyes when Nathan got her hot and bothered. Maybe her eyes changed color too.
Since Willa had chosen to eat the rawhide treat Nathan had given her by the French windows, Erin thought that would be a good place to settle Willa for the night. She was beckoning her dog over when Nathan walked into the kitchen with a bundle of towels.
None of them looked especially old, and Erin raised her eyebrows. “Maybe it would be best if I got her old blanket from the car. Those look too good to make up a dog’s bed.”
He shrugged and dropped them to the floor. “No big deal. But she might like something with her own scent on it, seeing as she’s in unfamiliar surroundings.”
Erin smiled, loving that he would think of that. “I’ll just go and fetch the blanket.”
Unsurprisingly, Willa followed her to the car, staying close by as Erin retrieved her blanket. When Erin walked back into the kitchen, Nathan was hunkered down, piling the towels one on top of the other, making up a bed in the alcove between two floor cupboards. He’d removed a pile of old newspapers and a recycling box, which now stood on the counter.
“You didn’t need to do that,” Erin said, moving forward with the blanket. “She could have slept by the door.”
“She’ll be warmer here and will likely feel more secure with something around her.”
He reached for the blanket, spread it over the towels, then stood and went to a drawer where he took out a couple of dog biscuits.
Erin watched, her throat thick while Nathan tended to Willa.
He hunkered down again and held out the biscuits. “Here, girl. You’ve got a nice warm bed and a nighttime treat. How’s that?”
Willa eyed Nathan, and the biscuits, with interest. Her tail wasn’t down this time as she walked cautiously over to Nathan, which pleased Erin immensely.
Nathan patted the bed, and Willa dutifully took up residence, her eyes wide while she waited for her treat.
After Nathan delivered, he stroked the dog’s head.
Fascinated, Erin stared and wondered at the transformation in Willa. She never in a million years had dreamed of her baby being settled for the night by anyone but her, especially not a man. Yet here was Willa, looking at Nathan with doe eyes while she chewed on her biscuits.
Erin’s throat got tighter, her eyes moistening dangerously while she gazed down at man and dog.
The fact Nathan had taken the time to buy Willa treats, clear a place for her bed and make it as comfortable as he could… Erin’s heart simply fell at his feet.
He stood and turned to face her. “So far, so good.”
Before she could change her mind, Erin walked across to where Nathan stood and wrapped her arms around his neck. The kiss she instigated was meant to tell him the words her tight throat wouldn’t allow her to speak.
She’d gone and done it, Erin thought dazedly. She’d gone and fallen for the man.
Nathan was the one to pull back, but he didn’t release his hold on her. “What was that for? Not that I’m complaining.”
Erin smiled up at him, letting her fingers flick through the ends of his hair. “Oh, you won’t have any cause to complain,” she teased, sliding her mouth along Nathan’s neck. “At least, not as soon as you get me upstairs and into that big bed of yours.”
She was hoisted up again, and his hard cock pressing against her pussy was a sharp, and extremely pleasant, reminder of where they’d left things ten minutes ago.
With one last glance at a happily munching Willa, Erin resumed her attention to Nathan’s neck all the way up the stairs and into his bedroom.
He laid her on the bed and slowly started to remove her clothes, kissing each part of her revealed flesh as he went. His touch had a reverence about it, making her feel as if she were a rare and precious jewel. Something lovely moved through her, prompting her to touch him in a similar fashion.
Their lovemaking was different. It felt like they connected on a deeper level, making every touch, every kiss seem even more intense than before. Nathan always demanded everything from her, but now she gave it from a place of wonder, a place of alarming clarity.
When he slipped inside her, the moment felt so perfect, so sublime, that her eyes filled. She placed her hands either side of his head, holding him in place so she could see his eyes. She didn’t want him to bury his face in her neck as he usually did each time he climaxed. She wanted to watch him, lose herself in him.
He rocked deeper, harder, faster. Erin wrapped her legs around him, drawing him so far inside her that she didn’t know where she ended and he began.
Her intimate muscles clenched around Nathan, pulling him with her as she rose up, wanting him to experience the intense pleasure at the very same moment she did. The orgasm rocked her very core, spiraling her ever upward.
Nathan shuddered above her, his whole body tightening. He closed his eyes, threw his head back, and a deep groan emanated from his chest. Erin felt him pulse inside her, spilling his seed into the condom.
He slumped over her, pressing his mouth to her throat, his teeth grazing her skin. For long moments, he held there, and she had the feeling he was about to…bite her. For some reason, it seemed every bit as intimate an act as penetration, and Erin felt a shiver move through her. What they shared went beyond anything they’d enjoyed before. At least, it had for her.
She trailed her fingers down his back, pressed a kiss to his temple. “Nathan…”
Then she realized he was tense. Really tense. Nathan inhaled sharply and pulled back from her, so the words she longed to say froze on Erin’s tongue. From his reaction, Erin sensed he didn’t feel the same way about what had happened as she did. In which case, revealing that he had rocked her to her very soul didn’t seem wise at that moment.
She didn’t say anything else. She wasn’t sure what she could say. But when Nathan rolled to his back and drew her against him, cradling her in his arms, Erin chose to enjoy the moment and take it for what it was. A tender embrace after very meaningful sex. She couldn’t worry about Nathan’s reaction to what had just happened. Because what they’d shared was only temporary. It couldn’t ever be anything else. The fact she was falling for h
im was her own stupid fault.
* * * * *
Nathan stared at the ceiling. He’d waited until Erin’s breathing had deepened and her body had gone lax with sleep before allowing himself to breathe fully. He had the strong urge to be outside, on the moor. To draw in the night air, feel the earth beneath him. To pound the land that was his home, take into his nostrils the dust that was so much a part of him.
The need wasn’t anything unusual. Especially after sex. But this felt…different.
Intense. Vital. Profound.
He needed to shift, to run like his very existence depended on it. As if the core of who he was would cease to exist if he didn’t release the need spiraling through him.
Slowly, he extricated his arm from around Erin’s shoulders. In sleep, she drew in a deep breath, gave a little mmm sound, and then settled. Watching her, he slipped from the bed and walked to the window.
The moor called to him. It was almost a physical thing. On the nights he’d stayed at Erin’s, he’d managed to withstand the call of his panther nature, promising himself that he’d shift into his primal form once he got home.
Now, he looked down and out beyond his patio toward the land that was his very essence, aware that right then he could not resist the need any more than he could resist his next breath.
He leaned on the windowsill, his chest tight and his heart pumping. Shit. What the hell was wrong with him? Something was happening, and he didn’t know what the fuck to do about it.
It was Erin’s doing, he realized with a glance over his shoulder toward her sleeping form. It had been slowly building, and he hadn’t been able to do a damn thing to stop it. Today, after she’d told him of the prick who’d treated her so badly, he’d wanted to find the fucker and make him pay. He’d wanted to annihilate the sonofabitch.
He curled his fingers into his palms while his chest squeezed tighter. Already he could feel the lengthening of his claws, the descent of his fangs.